The Joy of the Lord is My Strength

Motherhood is the hardest job I've ever had in my life. Granted I haven't lived that long, but I've had many jobs. At least the rest I could quit, not that I did but there was always an out. 

I love my kids, I do. But I can definitely understand why mom used to tell me that great grandma would sometimes pull her apron over her head (in the middle of her kitchen) and have some quiet time to herself to pray. She had 9 or so kids. I have 2. And the 4 yo is in school 3x/wk. 

In transitioning from full time therapist to full time SAH (stay at home) I find myself doubting my capabilities. Am I good enough? At work they give you employee reviews, raises, atta boys, & the families and patients pour praises on you for the good work you have done...even when you remind them it was the patient that did the hard work. You SEE that you are doing well.  Motherhood doesn't give these atta boys, unless you look for them. They're in my daughter tying her own shoes, cleaning up her dishes, feeding her fish, learning independence. It's in my baby's toilet training, booboos healed with magic mommy kisses, nighttime snuggles, or asking for "one more" when you sing them their goodnight song. 

I'm doing a good job, the best I can. I'm reading a motherhood book by Dr. Meg Meeker ... When I take time out for me. And she drills it home to take care of ourselves ... have girl friends. Which is slowly coming for me moving to a new town.  

Until then I will continue the nighttime snuggles, reread the recent library books, sweep the many crumbs off the floor, play kickball in the back yard, & keep looking for the descreet atta moms. God keeps reminding me to be a servant to all.